52 Questions “Why” for My Birthday

why celiac

I am inquisitive guy. I ask people a lot of questions; sometimes Mrs. Dude thinks it’s a bit much. But the other side is not asking any questions. And what do we learn from that? (See…there’s another question.)

So today, for my birthday, I’m asking 52 questions “Why”.

  1. Why 52 questions?
  2. Why do you think?
  3. Why did I wait 15 years to finally get serious about trying to learn the guitar?
  4. Why didn’t I start eating healthier as soon as I was diagnosed with celiac instead of just eating “gluten-free”?
  5. Why are 13 old, white, male senators determining the future of our health care?
  6. Why do fools fall in love?
  7. Why did they make Speed 2? Or Rocky 4-7? Or Caddyshack 2? Or Godfather 3? Or Pirates of the Caribbean 27?
  8. Why does anyone think its ok for our president, or anybody for that matter, to mock a disabled person?
  9. Why did the Mets trade Tom Seaver?
  10. Why does Udis continue to make unusable bread?
  11. Why can’t we have decent health insurance like other countries do?
  12. Why do I still have a landline phone in my office?
  13. Why do I still pay for cable TV?
  14. Why did I ever move to LA only to come back 10 months later?
  15. Why did I “follow” so much growing up instead of just being myself?
  16. Why can’t we do something about the gun violence in this country?
  17. Why does it hurt when I pee? (Frank Zappa)
  18. Why didn’t I start drinking coffee when I was younger?
  19. Why am I still not myself in certain situations and with certain people?
  20. Why did I get bladder cancer? And pulmonary embolisms? And yeah…let’s throw celiac in the mix.
  21. Why do dogs lick themselves? (answer: because they can)
  22. Why did my dad drink so much?
  23. Why do iPhone’s usually start falling apart after a year?
  24. Why do I let the haters get to me?
  25. Why can’t I get to that next phase of my business?
  26. Why did my dog just poop twice when I only had one bag?
  27. Why can’t we find a cure for cancer?
  28. Why was the Pet Rock ever a thing?
  29. Why did I have that fourth drink last Saturday?
  30. Why didn’t I discover serious exercise earlier?
  31. Why is the diagnosis rate for celiac still so low?
  32. Why is gluten-free STILL getting mocked by the media?
  33. Why can’t the Rangers win more than one Stanley Cup in 60 years?
  34. Why did I ever try to become an actor when it was clear early on it wasn’t in the stars?
  35. Why don’t I go grab a second cup of joe?
  36. Why don’t you hold on until I come back?
  37. Why yes…I’m back.
  38. Why don’t we get drunk and screw? (Jimmy Buffet)
  39. Why don’t we have bidets in this country?
  40. Why can’t Mrs. Dude and I find even two nights a week to watch House of Cards?
  41. Why was there EVER slavery?
  42. Why would a woman EVER make less than a man for the same position?
  43. Why do I start growing hair on my ears as I age?? (yes…that gets two question marks!)
  44. Why did my Aunt Carol have to lose two siblings (including my mom) and a best friend in a matter of six months?
  45. Why did McLean Stevenson leave MASH after two seasons?
  46. Why don’t we do it in the road? (The Beatles)
  47. Why did the Dudettes grow up so dang quickly?
  48. Why is it taking so long to finish the cover for my upcoming eBook?
  49. Why didn’t Dexter stop after season five?
  50. Why can’t we just find peace in the world?
  51. Why challenge the status quo?
  52. WHY NOT?

I may not have all the answers in life. But after 52 years, I sure have a lot of questions.

And finally…since year one of my blog, I’ve posted the below video. And after 8 years, it still makes me laugh. Enjoy.

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16 thoughts on “52 Questions “Why” for My Birthday”

  1. Happy birthday, Dude. And I used a toilet in the US yesterday with a bidet function, but I did not try it. I was scared. Is that the answer?

      1. A bidet is a glorious and wondrous invention. Some businesses and restaurants have them here (Honolulu) because they’re so popular in Japan.

  2. Question 21:
    “Two ol’ boys were sittin’ on the front porch one hot afternoon.
    One Boy’s old dog started licking his *”unmentionables”*
    The other Boy looked at his friend and said, ‘Man, I wish I could do that.’
    His friend said, ‘Don’t be stupid boy – that dog’d bite you!”

    Which is only to encourage Dude, if it still hurts you to pee (Q17) and with your past & recent history, I hope all is well & your Med tests are coming out as you desire … my well wishes for your great health are with you (& Mrs Dude on the Dude Ranch) my friend!
    I know Mrs Dude will not let you ignore your health as men are wont to do.

    & Happy Birthday & many, many more !!!

  3. Happy Birthday!! Just turned 52 myself…I will add to your questions with a simple one….why do some people say “celiacs”?

    1. We are like fine wine. Aging gracefully. And that’s a real good question. One of life’s many wonders.

  4. Probably need more, I mean when it is not used in a plural sense…”she has celiacs disease”…or “I have celiacs” sounds weird to me, always sounds like CELIAX…I guess when your over 50 you start to ponder meaningless stuff:)

  5. Happy 52, Dude! Hope you have a great day! And I wish I had the answer to why a few OLD, WHITE, GUYS are in charge of our health care. Worst in the world! Love and appreciate all you do. Keep up the great job.

  6. Dude,

    They say it’s your birthday, well, Happy Birthday to you. Have a grand one! And many more to follow!

    Along with the plural usage of Celiacs I struggle with ‘glutened’. How do you pronounce that? 2 syllables or 3? Doesn’t exactly roll off the tongue.

    Lastly, question 8, “Why does anyone think its ok for our president, or anybody for that matter, to mock a disabled person?” struck a nerve with me. My son has a serious disability (Fibrous Dysplasia in his left femoral neck which is being held together with a titanium rod) and along with CD, Muscular Dystrophy runs in my family (I’ve lost 2 uncles, an aunt and 2 cousins to the disease) so it’s personal to me. It makes my blood boil when people mock, taunt or make fun of disabled people. They deserve compassion and support, not ridicule! Done ranting, I’m going to try and get back to my happy place again.


  7. Hey Dude, first – a very Happy Birthday- please take care of yourself! A concern about your comment “it hurts to pee”…. I really wish you would check this out; It is NOT normal and may be connected (or not connected) to your history. And it is too important to ignore. Loved your questions and, at the age of 77, I have no answers to any of them- lots of thoughts but no answers. I agree it is wrong to make fun of anyone with a disability. My 3 daughters grew up with an aunt who was disabled from cerebral palsy and being so close to her, early on they regarded her with compassion, love and the utmost consideration. That may well be part of the answer- education at an early age- no different than making fun of someone with celiac disease who looks like everyone else, but indeed suffers on the inside with an incurable disease. Making fun of them asking questions in a restaurant is no different.Enjoy your day!!

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Who I am. And who I'm not.

Who I am. And who I'm not.

I AM someone who's been gluten-free since 2007 due to a diagnosis of severe celiac disease. I'm someone who can steer you in the right direction when it comes to going gluten-free. And I'm someone who will always give you the naked truth about going gluten free.

I AM NOT someone who embraces this gluten-free craziness. I didn’t find freedom, a better life or any of that other crap when I got diagnosed. With all due respect to Hunter S. Thompson, I found fear and loathing of an unknown world. But if I can share my wisdom, tell my stories and make the transition easier on you, I’ve done my job.

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