What the heck is a Haiku you ask? In its simplest form, it’s a Japanese poem of seventeen syllables, in three lines of five, seven, and five.
And what on earth does it have to do with celiac disease? Absolutely nothing at all.
So then why am I writing a celiac Haiku? Well, when you post 31 blogs in 31 days, you need to think outside the box a bit. And I’m pretty confident this has not been done before. So even if it’s lame, I can still say it’s original.
Oh…and by the way, I am so game for your Haiku as well. All I ask for is one verse if you’ve got it inside you. It’s asking a lot, but it would be so cool to see what you come up with.
So I present to you, the first ever Celiac Haiku.
I used to drink beer
Now Titos is my best friend
I love you Titos
Pasta oh pasta
You were so soft this morning
Now you are granite
Time for a sandwich
But when I take my first bite
The bread falls apart
Not since I was two
Have I needed so many
Naps during the day
There is a bread crumb
On my gluten free counter
Time to disinfect
You told me before??
You’ll have to say it again
Yes…I have brain fog
Coffee and sushi
You are two of my best friends
Thank god you’re g-free
Order food naked
I will leave it up to you
What that really means
Dominos pizza
That was a half assed attempt
Going gluten free
Miss Kardashian
How was the In-n-Out Bun?
Gluten free?? Oh…Hi!!
What’s Gluten Relief?
It’s a scam for the ages
Please don’t believe it
The NFCA
Your intentions were honest
Please drop the amber
Celiac disease
It’s an autoimmune thing
A pain in my ass
There’s much we can have
Focus on the positive
It could be much worse
The month is now May
It’s Celiac Awareness
Let’s make it all year
To all celiacs
Let us journey together
Power in numbers
Mrs. Dude thank you
It’s not easy living with
Somebody like me
And to my Dudettes
May you be spared the curse of
The celiac gene
My sugar cookies
Almond flour butter eggs and stuff
Eat them up yummy
I’m sorry Carol, but I’m going to have to penalize you two points for the 8 syllable second line
🙂
That was AWESOME! I love this one:
Celiac disease
It’s an autoimmune thing
A pain in my ass
That should be our introduction. 🙂
Don’t want to be sick
No gluten even soy sauce
Whole new cooking thing
Great Job, Gluten Dude
Haiku can be very fun
Hippopotamus.
😉
When all else fails, always use hippopotamus in your haiku.
Best blog post ever. Haha loved this.
Thanks Brittany. Where’s your Haiku? 🙂
Great post! Love your determination:-D You are inspiring me … Thank You! Love your “Order Food Naked…” Haiku! Here’s my attempt …
What once was tasty
Is now my forbidden food
But Health Abounding!
I like it Conne…
Find Hidden Gluten
In makeup, meds and others
Searching makes me sad
Mouth ulcers owwie
My dentist never knew why
No gluten means none
Clever converting the word ouch to owwie. Well played Erica.
I have learned to adapt a lot of things after gong GF 🙂
Ugh. I’m sick again.
Damn cross-contamination.
What got me this time?
Awesome Luna…
I love my children
So we are all gluten free
it is now easy
Tracey, so simply yet so meaningful! Love this haiku
Agreed Erin. Very nice.
No longer bloated
My bikini fits better
Gluten is evil
That’s funny…not that you were bloated of course.
A perfect salad
My kids passing tortillas
Drop right on my plate
My perfect salad
So full of yummy veggies
Sits laughing at me
Guess I’ve lost my mind
A celiac’s got sixth sense?
“I see dead salads” 🙂
Hysterical Suzanne.
Gluten makes me mad
It makes my Dude really sick
Go gluten be gone!
Be gone indeed! Your husband must be one lucky guy 😉
Here is one of mine:
Gluten-free for me
Celiac since ‘81
Ahead of the trend 😉
Erin, you weren’t just ahead of the trend. You may have started the trend.
😉
How about this one?
Gluten-free? Trendy?
Yep, that’s me. Miley. Kim K.
I’m cooler than you.
Who knew celiac disease could be so much fun? I wish I discovered Haiku’s five years ago.
I travel the world
Now I do it gluten free
You can do it too! 🙂
I wish I could travel the world…
But when the day comes that I can, you’re coming with me to keep me safe.
You can totally travel the world! If I had stayed home for the past 30 years, I would be one miserable Celiac!
These are so awesome! Here’s mine about when I tried to do a shared kitchen:
Left hand for gluten
Right hand is for gluten-free
Oh crap I forgot
I would bet you were the only person to ever try this maneuver. Too funny (in a sad kind of way).
New ingredients
What the hell is xanthan gum?
Where do I buy it?
Gluten free is hard
GF vegetarian?
I may be insane.
(I LOVE this post. :))
And I love your haiku.
Gluten is no fun
It’s like Glue in your bun
Ooey, Gooey, Yuk!
4 stars for originality Martha.
Quinoa rocks it Dude
Millet isn’t just for birds
Gfree not Kardash
Nice abbreviation to get to 5 syllables. Who said haiku’s were easy??
It’s a new word this past week in Urban Dictionary –
Ex. “See you in a Kardash” referring to how shee went through her marriage quickly. I thought it worked welI – fleeting – fad like! 🙂
Was just diagnosed…
All this stuff so confusing
Where to go from here
I’m sorry to hear
That you are now one of us
Your new life begins
Please visit my blog
I will help all that I can
It gets easier
LOVE IT!
Bread… no, not for me
Udis, Rudis, oh em gee
Burn it… mmm Yummy!
Dr. Seuss, help me
I can have green eggs and ham
but please, no wheat flour
The very first Dr. Seuss reference in my blog. Nice!
These are all awesome! Here’s mine:
Made some big changes
Gluten and Dairy Free
Blessing in disguise
Quit your griping please
Gluten-Free isn’t that bad
Stopped pooping my pants
Love it. Especially appreciate the visual 🙂
I have beed a coeliac for more years than I can remember … it is Haiku malarkey that get me going … so I am going to follow you !
When tender bowel
enjoys gluten free warmly
kindly removes waste
Well done Helen. Nice visual 😉
OMG I love you. I love haiku. And I have Celiac Disease. This is fantastic!
Soy sauce in the cukes?
Another place off my list
Of joints to eat at.
This post brought much needed lightness to the last few hours. Celiac sucks!!!
Another one:
Spinach, eggs, and fish
And I don’t need to diet
But it’s all that’s safe
Well done Wendy!
No gluten for me
It isn’t a fad diet
And now I’m healthy
Excellent!