So a few days ago, we talked about Gluten-Free Love Stories and since then I’ve received some fantastic, heartwarming stories of how celiac/gluten has brought people together.
I can’t wait to post them next month.
But today, we have something quite the opposite. It seems celiac disease is breaking this marriage up.
Yes, I’m sure there are many underlying issues as well so I am not pinning this on celiac disease, but it’s not helping matters.
Read on and share your thoughts.
Dear Gluten Dude,
I KNOW guys are dumb but am I really the idiot my pregnant wife w/ celiac disease makes me out to be??
I bought her groceries at the hour-trip-across-town grocer. On the way, I bought her some lip gloss (gf of course…she even had me watching YouTube about it.) I bought the 30 dollar stuff thinking I’m gonna be a hero and instead I turned out to be the fool.
Apparently in Sephora (the store where I bought the lip gloss), gluten is in the air by way of perfume. My clothes are then glutened and I go to the grocery store after this. I buy 50 dollars worth of salsa, whole pineapple and cherries.
I have tried to surprise her before with other things. Not food. It seems there is always some way to call me an idiot. I cook her food and spend hours via bus and train getting her food. I admit I get frustrated but why do I have to be yelled at even for wearing my jacket in the kitchen? She sends me to stores just to make me return it all even if I even wash my hands thoroughly and double tie the bags.
I read your spousal support article but at what point is it not my fault? I can’t erase gluten from history (can I?).
I just want to know what should I do? She is driving me crazy. I know she did not ask for CD. But she yells at me for eating gluten…period. She changes the rules everyday. I can’t afford to buy gluten free food for 2 people on what I make. I cook her food with a clean kitchen and wash my hands with dawn to the point of peeling.
Do you have any advice for me? I fear we will be heading for divorce.
A few quick thoughts here. As I said above, it seems to me your marriage issues go beyond celiac disease but I am not wearing my marriage counselor hat today, so I’ll leave that to the experts.
To you I would say try to be patient. Celiac can affect somebody not only physically, but emotionally too. Add that to being pregnant and there could be a lot going on with her right now.
I would say to your wife that she needs to ease up on the gluten paranoia a bit. Yes…we need to be incredibly careful. But worrying about perfume on your clothes and then going grocery shopping seems a bit extreme to me. Celiacs don’t live in a plastic bubble. Being paranoid stops us from enjoying life.
And there is no reason for you to take any heat for eating gluten. You don’t have celiac disease…she does.
I encourage both of you to visit my site in February when I post the gluten free love stories. Maybe it will help you see the light a bit.
Good luck to the both of you.