The Gluten Dude turns 47 today.
How the hell did that happen??
It’s just a number…it’s just a number…it’s just a number.
That’s my mantra for the day.
As I blow the candles out on my sushi tonight, here is what I’ll be wishing for.
Oh…and if you’ve got two minutes, watch the above video. It’s fascinating, weird, interesting, funny and bizarre all wrapped up into one.
1. I wish I was turning 37.
2. Ok fine…I wish I was turning 27.
3. I wish I could celebrate tonight with all the celiacs I’ve connected with the past 6 months.
4. I wish Sassy would find healing. She deserves it.
5. I wish Dogfish Head’s gluten-free beer wasn’t raspberry flavored.
6. I wish Domino’s “gluten-free pizza” wasn’t such a half-assed effort.
7. I wish the Kardashians would just go away. Far, far away.
8. I wish I didn’t have to toast or nuke gluten-free bread to enjoy it.
9. I wish my iPad had better wifi.
10. I wish life was just a tad easier.
11. I wish that our political system wasn’t so broken.
12. I wish there were no such thing as war.
13. I wish my Dad took better care of himself and was still around.
14. I wish summer lasted six months.
15. I wish I could go back to high school with the knowledge and confidence I have now.
16. I wish I wasn’t so shy as a kid.
17. I wish Inspired RD success and safety in her trip to Ethiopia.
18. I wish the Rangers won the Stanley Cup.
19. I wish the Knicks would stop sucking so bad.
20. I wish people understood celiac more.
21. I wish Amy’s would use a dedicated gluten-free facility.
22. I wish our gluten-free food was “easily” tax deductible.
23. I wish I didn’t have that second drink last night.
24. I wish I didn’t have that third drink last night.
25. I wish I could work less and play more.
26. I wish Caddyshack never made a second movie.
27. I wish Rocky never made a fourth, fifth or sixth movie.
28. I wish the internet was invented when I was a kid.
29. I wish I could text half as fast as my kids.
30. I wish my dog didn’t pee on the rug last night.
31. I wish this list wasn’t taking me so damn long to write.
32. I wish I punched Mike Perry in the face at least once (long story).
33. I wish I could fly.
34. I wish I didn’t hate to fly.
35. I wish Chef Kate could come live with us.
36. I wish I would stop having dreams that I’m best friends with the cast of “Friends” (or at least someone could at least analyze wtf this dream even means).
37. I wish I could play my guitar 30 minutes a day so I could at least play something that resembled music.
38. I wish I started going to the gym regularly at age 22 instead of 32.
39. I wish I remembered to bring the garbage down to the curb last night (they’re outside my house right now).
40. I wish gluten-free meant 100% gluten-free.
41. I wish Gluten Relief could be pulled from the market and Jason could see the light.
42. I wish I didn’t have to talk about food so much.
43. I wish Mrs. Dude knew how much I love and appreciate her.
44. I wish the Dudette’s a life of adventure and happiness.
45. I wish I could personally thank each and every one of you for sharing your gluten-free journey on my blog and being a part of mine.
46. I wish you all a fantastic day.
47. I wish I didn’t have celiac disease. (But I accept it as part of my path.)