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47 Comments

  1. 1

    Erica

    Thank you for sharing my story, Gluten Dude! You’re awesome!

    Reply
    1. 1.1

      The Gluten Dude

      The feeling is quite mutual…

      Reply
  2. 2

    J

    Erica,

    You give me hope. Thank you.

    -J

    Reply
    1. 2.1

      Erica

      There is someone out there for everyone, I promise. And that person will love and appreciate you despite of food complications. It’s just food, right? It’s such a small part of love :)

      Reply
  3. 3

    Berni White

    Preach on sister! I had the same problem – gluten, wheat AND dairy free?! It can be near impossible! I feel bad “inflicting” my diet on friends and family, never mind on a potential boyfriend. But somehow I got sooo lucky with my boyf – he’s brilliant! He’s not gone gluten/dairy free – that’s too much to ask!!! But he always reads foods labels in the supermarket to see if it will poison me or not. He’s happy to go to the same ” safe” restaurants time and again. He’s very patient with me when I complain that “I feel sick”. Men like him do exist! It’s just a case of finding them!

    Reply
    1. 3.1

      Erica

      That’s awesome! Comments like yours do inspire others to realize that people can adapt to these diets and live with someone with a severe food allergy!

      Reply
  4. 4

    Alysa (InspiredRD)

    So excited to finally read your post on this! You are inspiring for so many people out there, way to go girl :)

    Reply
    1. 4.1

      Erica

      Thank you, beautiful!

      Reply
  5. 5

    Sassy Celiactivist

    There will be people that get it, and people that don’t. I find it’s the first date that always gets a little hijacked because of it, sometimes. This is something I’m still working on. I’m all for educating people about Celiac Disease, and I understand that people get curious about things they don’t know…and yes, I know, that IS a good thing. But sometimes it feels like the whole first date turns into me giving a seminar. It doesn’t help that I’m still so sick, because I have to explain that, too, and things become more difficult because I have to watch how late I stay up, etc. I like making jokes about it, but sometimes have found that these jokes lead to pity, which isn’t my intention. I never want to assume the guy will pick up the check, and with not being able to work, I have to make sure I can afford it. I just can’t contribute the way I used to in relationships, so I guess I’m still finding my way. And god forbid my brain fog memory lapses come off as insincerity! I want someone I can be myself around and not have to always put on the brave face, but that’s not something that comes immediately, so it can just be tiring and a lot of brave faces for people that aren’t worth it on that journey to someone who is. I miss the people who knew me when I was healthier and more “fun”.

    I haven’t given up hope, I guess I’m just wanting to say thank you for this post. I wanted to point out a few more difficulties that maybe others are having, too. I know the good ones are out there, but gluten-free and illness can definitely make one shy away from the process a little bit!

    Reply
    1. 5.1

      The Gluten Dude

      We were out with good friends last week talking about my health (I know…boring) and Mrs. Dude sadly said “This is not the guy I married.”.

      Eff you celiac…

      Reply
      1. 5.1.1

        Sassy Celiactivist

        :(

        Yes, sometimes the thought inevitably comes up, “Why would someone want to be with the sick girl when there are plenty of healthy ones out there?”

        Then, I remember I’m awesome.

        LOL.

        Reply
        1. 5.1.1.1

          Erica

          Ooof – yeah, that’s a statement I kept telling myself over and over again. But, then I found someone. And like everyone will tell you about dating, it happens when you least expect it with a person you probably don’t expect either. And it will be magic! You’re amazing, and you demand that magic – everyone does (regardless of terrible cookies and lack of restaurant choices).

          Reply
          1. 5.1.1.1.1

            Sassy Celiactivist

            “terrible cookies” LOL

            So awesome, Erica…and thank you :)

            Reply
            1. V

              “Then I remember I’m awesome.”

              Love it!

              Reply
      2. 5.1.2

        Miss Dee Meanor

        In the past three days I’ve been nauseated twice after eating Glutino’s gluten-free pretzels. The reaction is almost immediate. Pretty soon I’ll be reduced to grazing in the yard. It has gotten where most of the processed gluten-free snack foods make me feel icky (that’s a technical term).

        Reply
      3. 5.1.3

        Kathie

        comment from Gluten Dude

        “We were out with good friends last week talking about my health (I know…boring) and Mrs. Dude sadly said “This is not the guy I married.”.
        Eff you celiac…”

        Unfortunately every time we eat out with someone unfamiliar, celiac ends up being the topic du jour…a good friend just occasionally asks me how the “silly-ass” is going….

        Reply
    2. 5.2

      Susannah

      Hi,
      Thank you for what you wrote. I just got off the phone an hour ago with my wonderful, amazing, loving son was diagnosed with Celiac a year ago after years of struggling with his symptoms and health. We talked about exactly what this article and your response is about, (which is why I went searching the internet and found it).
      He wants so much to find someone and have a family someday but you hit the nail on the head with his dating dilemma.
      I have no idea where you are or how old you are, but if you are anywhere near the San Francisco Bay Area and in the 25-35 age range there is a great guy looking for a great girl.
      Susannah

      Reply
  6. 6

    Rachel (GFreeGal)

    So very cool of you to share your journey in dating. I’m sure many single people with Celiac (or any other food allergy) feel like such a burden. I know I am blessed beyond words to have my supportive husband, who your boyfriend sounds just like. :) Don’t give up people…your health is worth it and you not only want, but NEED someone who’s going to support you. :) Great post!

    Reply
    1. 6.1

      Erica

      Thank you! I really didn’t feel “worth it” before, and I’m glad I finally found someone that makes me feel like he’s getting everything he wants even though he’s faced with this challenge. I’m so lucky!

      Reply
  7. 7

    Ken Scheer

    As you know, last month I wrote about this as well. It can be challenging for sure but my belief system has always been that if someone wants to be with you they will no matter what the circumstances are. It isn’t easy and I’ve been told by a lot of people that they will actually hide their food allergies because they feel it would be a deal breaker. However, I do believe it would be easier across the board to date someone that did have the same allergies because of potential cross-contamination in homes etc.

    Reply
    1. 7.1

      Erica

      I smell an investment idea a’ brewin’ – GLUTEN FREE DATING SITES!

      Reply
      1. 7.1.1

        Sassy Celiactivist

        I’m tellin’ ya…Celiac Singles dot com! I’ve said this many times, it will happen, I’m sure of it. If I had any expertise in this area, I’d be all over it :)

        Reply
        1. 7.1.1.1

          Vicky

          Sassy,
          There is one I just searched it. http://www.singleswithfoodallergies.com

          But Dude you maybe can start one too! :)

          Reply
          1. 7.1.1.1.1

            Sassy Celiactivist

            Americans, only, but good find!

            Reply
  8. 8

    Erica

    Just so you know, Gluten Dude, I just watched that video and lost it – there are tears rolling down my face right now. I am SUCH a sucker for love, especially since I didn’t believe in it for 20-some years :) You got me!

    Reply
    1. 8.1

      The Gluten Dude

      I can’t take credit for it, but it is an awesome video. Not that it made me tear up or anything (sniff…sniff) I swear.

      Reply
  9. 9

    Ken Scheer

    So funny you all are saying dating site as it’s part of my business plan but I’m not sure if just GF is enough. I think it would have too be including all choices, vegan etc.

    Reply
  10. 10

    jiggy

    SO I’ve started this gluten free battle last year. When i shared that i eat gluten free with someone i was supposed to go out on date with, he said what if he finds someone better than me, There it goes- an indicator of him not being the one.

    It hurt but i keep marching forward.
    Thank you for this post. Really appreciate it.

    Reply
    1. 10.1

      Erica

      You deserve better than that! Good for you for moving onto someone who will love you for you and your terrible cookies. I think I’m going to copyright that phrase or something :)

      Reply
  11. 11

    Vicky

    Hey Dude, Why don’t you set up a GF dating service? I looked for one and not seen any yet. And better yet have it free like plenty of fish dot com where we can message back and forth. But to chat we pay!

    Reply
  12. 12

    Andrea

    Sorry, but I just have to say I love how cookies can be an emergency!
    I miss being able to have those emergencies myself, but I fully understand and don’t blame him a bit.

    Reply
  13. 13

    Amanda

    ugh i so know the feeling!! I once went out with a guy that didnt care at all and told me to “just eat a salad for gods sake” hahaa..one and only date. my hubby was fabulous though..didnt give up beer but always is very considerate and when we started dating he called ahead and asked to talk to the chef directly once we arrived at restaurants..he was even comfortable leaving a place that he felt didnt know as much as they said they did..(it was his fav restaurant). we had to concur the mixing of our families as well..my 2 children are very cautious as they were raised with it and had seen me sick..his 2 kids had a hard time adjusting to “gluten free” rules..but we stay on them like crazy and it works out well:0)

    Reply
  14. 14

    Adina | Gluten Free Travelette

    Great post Erica & thanks for sharing it Gluten Dude! There really are some wonderful significant others out there. My husband stuck by my through almost 7 years of dating with lots of medical and food issues – I went gluten free just months before we got engaged and he’s been a prince. The night we got engaged, he had planned out a safe gluten free dinner at a restaurant – called ahead to work out with the chef what was safe – they even had a special menu and table waiting for us when we arrived. The good ones are out there!

    Reply
  15. 15

    KrisandT

    Cool and funny post :P

    Please check out our blog! http://krisandtgogfree.blogspot.com/
    College students eating Gfree on a budget. We post restaurant and product reviews, recipes, tips, and advice :D

    Reply
    1. 15.1

      The Gluten Dude

      I don’t mind you adding your site on my blog if you feel it can help people. But if you’re going to use my blog to pimp your site, at least offer something of substance on mine.

      That’s not asking too much…

      Reply
      1. 15.1.1

        KrisandT

        Agreed.

        We really hope to spread gluten free awarness for celiacs on a budget (students). We can definitely post links to your website on our blog.

        Reply
  16. 16

    Katertot

    I just wanted to say that MY cat has to be gluten free because she has some sort of grain allergy/sensitivity that makes her skin fall off badly. I get her BG (Before Grain) food from Petco, or Nature’s Path Green Pea and Duck (she can’t have chicken).

    Reply
  17. 17

    date

    Hey there! I could have sworn I’ve been to this blog before but after browsing through some of the post I realized it’s new to me.
    Anyhow, I’m definitely delighted I found it and I’ll be book-marking and checking back frequently!

    Reply
  18. 18

    Stefannie

    I just need to share…your story made me smile bc my hubby was the same. I got diagnosed 6 months into our relationship…6 months after sharing beer and wings watching the game together..when we found out I had celiac I have him the out-told him it would be hard and he didn’t need to deal with it…his reply? He looked at me like I had 10 heads and told me we were in it together..he is amazing…3 1/2 yrs later we are married and he is sometimes more cautious then I am! He will ask 500 questions when we go out and stop me sometimes to make sure I checked something when I become too trusting..
    He is 100% supportive!

    See there are good guys out there…they may be harder to find but when they do…they are the true epitome if Prince Charming!! Good luck!

    Reply
    1. 18.1

      The Gluten Dude

      Your story warmed by heart Stefannie. Thanks for starting my day off with a smile.

      Reply
  19. 19

    Nicole

    Love this story……. The beginning is exactly how I feel- I hope I get my happy ending:)

    Reply
    1. 19.1

      The Gluten Dude

      Don’t we all ;)

      Reply
  20. 20

    Kathie

    I have to share this post with 2 of my twenty-something kids who now are eating GF… confidence is key!!

    Reply
  21. 21

    killme

    yes.. good for you.. as a woman is pretty there is always a guy which would take a care of her.. protect her.. and her celiatic disease is not a problem for him..

    but imagine that you are not woman but a man as me – which healthy girl with even bother with a man who is having this problems? There are another 90 men which are ok what means:

    1. Our life will be much more easier
    2. much more lower expenses for foods
    3. OUR kids will have a chance to NOT having this disease..

    I think that you see my point.. this is worst than a cancer for a men..

    options?

    1. ear so much money that lady will just overlook this disease
    2. find a girl with this disease
    3. kill yourself and hope that there will be next life

    .. any other options?

    thanks!!!

    Reply
    1. 21.1

      B

      killme, please don’t be like that!

      If a person truly cares about another, they will change their ways to accommodate the other.

      This goes for a lot more people than just those who are gluten free. Drinkers, messy people, religious/non-religious people, even sports fans all learn this in relationships. When you find someone who wants you to be the best you can be, they will change their habits because they want to. Not because you make them, because they want you as your best self. It takes some time and a lot of patience but I have realized this and love to share it with others.

      Sure, it may be more expensive and create a need to be more creative with how your nourish your body, but it is 100% worth it. It is more difficult to have a gluten free lifestyle, but that doesn’t mean for a second that you should quit because of it. As for passing along the disease, you have no control over that and there is no sense worrying about it now.

      To end, here’s a cheesy quote I adore: “I’m not telling you it’s going to be easy, I’m telling you it’s going to be worth it.”

      You can do it!! It’s going to be hard and I know how much it sucks having to be constantly on the lookout for sneaky glutens but I would rather be happy and healthy any day of the week.

      Good luck on your journey!

      B

      Reply
  22. 22

    Casey

    Thank you Erica and Glutendude for this amazing post. My first date actually happened a week after my Celiac diagnosis, and it definitely wasn’t easy. I stayed glued to my phone looking up GF options half the time and still managed to get glutened. Gahhh!

    I’m happy to know that it is possible to find a partner while eating gluten free. I’m about to enter the college dating scene so wish me luck! :)

    Reply
  23. 23

    Victor

    A nice story with a happy ending.
    I am a male coeliac. I’ve been alone forever.
    I can’t tell a women I have a food allergy. They like to go to nice resturants.
    So what do you do? I remain alone. It is very hard to meet a woman who will accept this health issue.
    Dating is bad news.

    Reply

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